Lowell, MI -Hearts and cupids are everywhere this time of year, but what if you haven’t been bitten by the love bug? Or if your sweetheart is hundreds or thousands of miles away? Singles often feel out at a time when it seems the whole world is focused on couples making romantic plans and buying Valentine’s gifts for each other.

If this sounds familiar, don’t despair. You already have the perfect date for the holiday. This person will never take you to a restaurant you hate, they will never buy you jewelry you find incredibly tacky, or bring you roses when your favorite flowers are daisies. So who is this mysterious Mr./Ms. Right? Yourself!

People often lose track of the importance of loving and accepting not only others, but themselves. When you love who you are, others can’t help but notice the confidence that radiates from within. They will inevitably be drawn in, wanting to get to know you better. Take a moment to consider a person you know who obviously dislikes themselves. Chances are, he or she has a very negative attitude about live in general. While Grumpy Cat may be adorable, being around a human version of her for very long can be extremely emotionally draining. If you just realized that the Grumpy Cat in your life is you, here are a couple of things you can do to start changing that.

First of all, stop being afraid to do things alone. If you don’t want to spend time with you, why would someone else? At least once a month, make a point to do something you enjoy for no reason other than that it will make you happy. Take yourself out for coffee with a good book or go for a walk in a park. It can even be something as simple as making or buying a meal you love and watching your favorite movie for the hundredth time. Who cares if everyone else you know is so sick of that movie they could scream? This is a date night when you don’t have to care what the other person thinks because there is no other person.

Perhaps even more important than embracing alone time is dealing with negative self-talk. We all have times when we wonder how we could have possibly done or said something so stupid or look in the mirror and think we look like the Goodyear Blimp even though people around us may think we could be a supermodel. Next time you catch yourself in one of those moments, stop. Take a deep breath. Now, for each piece of negative self-talk, try to think of three positive things about yourself. Negative thoughts can’t be avoided completely, but they can be neutralized by reminding yourself that even though you made a mistake, it doesn’t define who you are. You are a beautiful, amazing person who has the potential to make the world a better place, but only if you give yourself a chance.

This Valentine’s Day, try not to focus on everyone else having dates with their significant others when you don’t. Take yourself out or cook a dinner you love, maybe invite some single friends over, and devote the evening to some fun and relaxation that’s all about you. Give yourself one of those green facial masks, have a glass of wine or sparkling grape juice, watch a fabulous romantic movie, and fall in love with yourself.

Local Valentine’s Day events that can be attended with or without a partner

Thursday, February 12

7-8:30pm Valentine’s Dance Workshop at Armentality Dance and Yoga Education

Friday, February 13

8am-5pm “Born to Beguile” Art Expo and Reception at Flashlight Alley

Saturday, February 14

2-4pm Fashion and Tea at Grand Rapids Public Museum

1-5pm Love, Wine, and Chocolate at Robinette’s Apple Haus and Winery

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